Cycle one: BFN

Today marks our first BFN (big fat negative). 10 days past iui and ive started spotting….its the start of good old AF ( aunt flow). This was our first medicated iui (clomid and interuterine insemination). I was hopeful, I have had different symptoms the whole way through this cycle. My lower back was sore, I was extremely moody and I was exhausted. Thinking those were good symptoms of maybe pregnancy, I took it easy with minimal alcohol comsumption. But all my hope was dashed today when I discovered I was spotting.

 It is really hard to remain positive. The IF community has been amazing…so supportive and caring. Complete strangers forming bonds with other ladies on the same journey, its really helped me through the emotional journey.

Next cycle wont be happening, ( we will be away at time of ovulation), so im not sure what will be suggested to us. All I know and realize is that our relationship is strong and this WILL NOT break us. After the tears, the time to grieve…we will be back with a vengeance. IF, you will not destroy my dream of being a mom.

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